A place to share stories, articles, pictures, etc. that are absorbing, arresting, engaging, engrossing, enthralling, fascinating, gripping, immersing, intriguing, involving, riveting - anything but interesting!
Monday, July 31, 2006
Magicians Battle It Out for World Title
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STOCKHOLM, SWEDEN — Cards sailed through the air to the rhythm of Chopin, and a rabbit — predictably — was pulled out of a hat as contestants from China to the Virgin Islands on Monday kicked off the World Championship of Magic.
The prize: lucrative contracts for stage shows in Las Vegas, Paris and Monaco.
Some 156 magicians from 64 countries are taking part in the main event, while thousands of others are performing in public shows, street acts and even workshops.
The performers each get 10 minutes on stage to impress a panel of judges, with the best advancing to a final session on Saturday, when the winners will be decided, said Dag Lofalk, president of the organizing committee.
Seth Engstrom, 18, is competing for Sweden in close-up magic, where magicians use slight-of-hand and small objects such as cards and coins. The other section of the main event is stage magic, with grand illusions involving humans and other props.
'It is always the creative ones who win,' said Engstrom of his idea of mixing card magic and Chopin's piano music. 'They want you to come up with new ideas.'
The contest is closed to the public, but followed closely by the more than 2,500 magicians — from as far away as China, New Zealand, Macau and the Virgin Islands — who have gathered in Stockholm for the event.
The championship began in 1948 and has lately been held every three years.
Magicians use the event to learn from each other — but keep their closely guarded secrets to themselves. However, the public will get their share of magic as well, with hundreds of magicians taking part in shows, lectures and workshops, and doing tricks on the streets and in parks, Lofalk said.
'This is the first time we try to open the event up a bit more to the public, to give them a chance to see the acts as well,' he said.
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On the Net:
http://www.fism.com
Sunday, July 30, 2006
Police nab smurfs for trampoline theft
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30 July 2006
By MARCUS BROGDEN
Two blue smurfs were left with red faces on Saturday night after they were arrested by police for stealing a trampoline.
Senior Sergeant Brian Benn told NZPA two drunk 19 year olds, 'dressed as smurfs', were seen carrying the trampoline along Richardson Street, Dunedin about 1am.
Smurfs are fictional small creatures who featured in the 1980s television series The Smurfs.
'When they saw the police had noticed them they dropped the trampoline and took off.'
Mr Benn said police had to track them over several back yards.
'Two were located, but a third man got away,' he said.
The men will appear in Dunedin District Court tomorrow.
The trampoline had been taken from a garden in southern Dunedin.
Giant Dead Eel Tossing Contest Canceled
Another side note, this article contains many statements and words that could be considered double entendre: "conger cuddling," "swing the giant conger," "defrost the conger"
(sorry, the last one was an exact quote)
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Katie Fretland, AP Writer
LONDON — For more than 30 years, crowds have flocked to the small English fishing village of Lyme Regis to watch an annual tradition — two teams of fishermen standing on wooden platforms as human bowling pins, hurling a dead giant eel at each other. But the ritual was abruptly abandoned after an animal rights activist threatened to draw negative publicity to the latest tournament, organizers said Saturday.
The practice, known as conger cuddling, is the annual highlight in the small coastal town about 155 miles southwest of London. The object of the game is to knock the opposing team off the platform by swinging a 25-pound eel at them.
Crowds have flocked to Lyme Regis since 1974 to watch rival teams of nine men swing the giant conger eel — suspended in the harbor by a rope — and local residents said they are dismayed at the demise of their historic event.
Andrew Kaye, a resident and spokesman for the Lyme Regis lifeboat crews who raise money through the tournament, said an anonymous e-mailer had called the practice disrespectful to the dead eel.
The lone activist threatened to film the contest to attract adverse media attention, Kaye said.
'We decided that it really wasn't worth upsetting anybody by going ahead with using a dead conger,' Kaye said. 'But it's a dead conger, for Pete's sake. I shouldn't think the conger could care one way or another.'
He said fishermen often accidentally catch the creatures in their nets, deep-freeze them and defrost them in preparation for the tournament.
Ron Bailey, a fishing boat skipper, said the tournament is meant as a wet, carnival-like event which usually raises about $5,600 for Royal National Lifeboat Institution lifeboat crews.
About 300 people attended an alternative event on Friday night. But the boat dock fender that participants used paled in comparison to being struck by a dead eel, Bailey said.
� 2006 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed."
Friday, July 28, 2006
Police arrest "Viagra gang" suspect
Thursday, July 27, 2006
Inmate's Request for Liquor License Denied
You have got to give them props for trying...
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Town officials have nixed an idea for a jailhouse bar. The Select Board, acting as the town liquor board, rejected an inmate's application to sell liquor from the state prison.
Paul Murphy of Worcester, Mass., is serving time at the Southern State Correctional Facility for aggravated assault, escape and passing bad checks.
He said in an application for a first- and second-class liquor license that he wanted to sell liquor from his home, which he listed as 700 Charlestown Road. That also happens to be the address of the state prison just east of downtown Springfield.
Regardless of the bid to have liquor delivered to a prison, town officials say many portions of the application were left blank.
"We determined that the application was incomplete," said Town Manager Robert Forguites.
Springfield officials were surprised to receive the application. They assumed prison officials would have caught it before it was sent and they believed the state Liquor Control Department also would have stopped it.
Prison officials say they review incoming mail in the presence of an inmate to ensure it doesn't contain contraband. But they don't look at mail sent by prisoners.
And Liquor Control Department officials say they had not received the application. They said they don't conduct a background check on an applicant until town officials have approved. If they'd received Murphy's, they said, it would have been rejected.
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Information from: Rutland Herald, http://www.rutlandherald.com/
Cool Tool: The Shade
Conventional car shades are unwieldy, prone to slipping off, and awkward to store.
The Shade requires careful installation, but thereafter takes only a second to put up or roll away. This makes one much more likely to use it regularly, resulting in fewer surprises when those clouds vanish midday. It is well built, sturdy, and reliable. The retraction mechanism on my original unit is as strong and smooth as on a new one; I know, because I've bought eight more of these shades over the years for friends and family. The glue for the mounting brackets is strong stuff, my right-hand brackets fell off this summer, but that was after six years of New Mexico sun. Replacement brackets were $5, and my Shade is now remounted and ready for another six years.
They are sized to fit different car models.
-- Ed Santiago
The Shade
$27
Available from Dash Designs
Woman mails five-foot python
Reuters - A German woman sparked panic at her local post office when a 1.5-meter (5-foot) albino python escaped from a packet she had mailed, police said Tuesday.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Accused Prowler Found Asleep in Police Van
BELLEVUE, WASH. — Police in this Seattle suburb didn't have to go far to arrest a man for investigation of car prowling. He was found sleeping in a special weapons and tactics van.
Officer Greg Grannis said a municipal worker reported someone breaking into cars, including his own, shortly before midnight Monday.
Officers quickly found burglarized cars, but couldn't determine who might be responsible — until about 4:50 a.m., when two SWAT team members came to the police vehicle maintenance yard to get their van and found a 25-year-old transient asleep in the back, Grannis said.
The man, whose his last known home address was in Louisiana, was booked into the King County jail for investigation of burglary.
No damage or loss estimate was released, but Grannis said none of the burglarized police vehicles had weapons in them.
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Information from: King County Journal, http://www.kingcountyjournal.com/
Polish passer-by hit by Saint Bernard dog thrown out of window - Yahoo! News
"WARSAW (AFP) - A hapless Polish pedestrian was left bruised and battered after he acted as a safety net for a 50-kilogramme (110 pound) Saint Bernard dog that had been thrown out of a second-storey window by its drunken owners in southern Poland."
Trojan Spoofs Firefox Extension, Steals IDs
Hear yea, hea yea! Beware all Mozilla Firefox users...
Link to Information Week article
The Dilbert Blog: My New Goal
"My New Goal"
by Scott Adams
My goal in life is to be carried. My thinking is that you’re not really successful if you have to do your own walking. I want to be so important that other people are willing to carry me from room to room, even down the street. And I don’t mean carry me on some sort of raised platform either. I want to be carried like a basket of laundry by one person at a time.
Sometimes I think it’s a good thing that I’m not a billionaire. I do okay with this Dilbert thing I have going, but I’m a long way from being carried. If I had a billion dollars I wouldn’t do anything for myself. I’d be all “I’ll give you a million dollars to carry me to the bathroom and brush my teeth. And don’t wake me up while you do it.”
Obviously I would have a staff for carrying me from room to room around the mansion. But when I traveled, I would pay random strangers to carry me, and not the big ones either. I’d want the scrawny strangers to carry me because it’s more of a challenge. I’d tell them it builds character.
I might pay someone to make a special shirt for me with a luggage handle on the back. I’d use that for traveling. When I checked into a hotel, as the limo driver carried me to the front desk, the desk clerk would say, “Do you need help with your bags?” I’d say, “Yes, and for $600,000 I want you to carry me upstairs and hold me over the strainer. I’ve been drinking Grey Goose for the past six hours.” Then little 110-pound “Erica from Toledo” will leap over the front desk and start carrying me toward the elevator. That’s when I’d say, “Oh, I forgot to tell you: I don’t do elevators.”
I’d also enjoy having so much money that I could punish anyone who annoyed me, but in some totally legal way. For example, if I got a telemarketing call during dinner, it would go like this:
Me: (answering phone) Y-y-yellow.
Telemarketer: Would you like to buy some crap from a stranger?
Me: I’ll give you $500,000 to beat yourself up right now.
Telemarketer: What?
Me: You heard me. But now it’s only $400,000. You should have started punching yourself in the nose immediately.
It’s illegal to pay someone to beat a person up, but I’m almost certain it’s legal to pay someone to beat himself up. It’s just way more expensive.
Anyway, my point is that it’s important to have goals."
Tires help urban sidewalks bounce back
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
Club-wielding chimp disappears after sighting
Monday, July 24, 2006
'E-mortgages' on the way
NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com) -- There's a quiet revolution going on in the mortgage industry: Home buyers soon will be securing mortgages and closing on sales almost as easily and conveniently as they purchase an airline ticket online.
Link
News for those over 70 - drink up!
SI.com - Jockey to face inquiry over head-butt to horse
Sunday, July 23, 2006
Einstein letters reveal a turmoil beyond science
Link
Friday, July 21, 2006
FDA "Green Light" for Sale of SmartPill
Microsoft confirms plan to take on Apple's iPod - Jul. 21, 2006
The Dilbert Blog
I’m in full-out pre-wedding mode. And that means multi-tasking no matter how much I’d prefer to avoid it. For example, at about 1 am this morning I cleaned the cat box but didn’t have time to take the neatly bundled bag of poop all the way to the garage. It was an impressive load. We have two hippo-sized felines and I didn’t have time to clean the box yesterday.
So I left the massive bag at the top of the stairs to remind me to finish the delivery when I left in the morning. Then I went to bed. So far, so good.
This morning I lugged the bag downstairs and realized that today is garbage day, and the cans are full to overflowing. No problem – I’ll just use the garbage can at my office.
At this point you should know that my morning routine involves waking around 6 a.m., grabbing a banana from the kitchen and walking the 47 seconds from my home to my office down the street.
This morning we were out of bananas. So I grab a yogurt and a plastic spoon in my right hand, the massive load-o-poop in the other, and stagger out the front door, operating on about 7 hours of sleep in two days. I’m so tired that I literally can’t walk a straight line. I probably look drunk, and I’m hoping the neighbors aren’t awake, because if you see a guy carrying a load of crap in one hand and his breakfast in the other, that’s how you’ll remember him for the rest of your life.
At some point, probably about 32 seconds into my commute, it dawned on me that I had inadvertently become a metaphor for life in general. Life is half delicious yogurt, half crap, and your job is to keep the plastic spoon in the yogurt.
Davy Jones Before And After
BEFORE:
AFTER THE VFX ARE APPLIED:
More images here.
Urban Legends: Hippo Eats Dwarf
"A circus dwarf died when he bounced off a trampoline into the mouth of a hippopotamus."
Waiting to get "Lost?"
"ABC just announced that there will be no Lost until 2007. Apparently, ABC exec listened to fans who hate the current schedule of showing 6 episodes in the Fall, then going on hiatus, then picking up again in the Spring. Most fans wanted a straight, uninterrupted stretch for the season."
Freakonomics Blog � Customer Sabotage
“I’ll be glad when [Ann] Coulter drops off the [best-seller] list, for obvious reasons of taste, but also because customers keep turning her book around or taking it off the shelf and hiding quantities in the back of the store.”
Thirteen states to offer sales tax holiday this year - Jul. 21, 2006
A Low-Water Mark for Broadcast TV Viewing
Thursday, July 20, 2006
Fish with human-like teeth
Odontophobia - Fear of teeth or dental surgery.
I'll dub it "Ichthydontophobia."
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Local6.com - A fish caught in Lubbock, Texas, with teeth that look like they belong to a human has baffled wildlife officials in the area, according to a report. Fisherman Scott Curry reeled in the 20-pound fish on Buffalo Springs Lake and immediately noticed the catch had human-like teeth. A game warden photographed the fish and is attempting to identify it. General Manager of Buffalo Springs Lake Greg Thornton told KLBK13-TV in Texas that he has never seen anything like the fish in the 36 years he has lived near the lake. A search for what the fish may be suggested that it may be a pacu, which is found in South America. Curry said he believes he saw another similar fish while on the lake. A Texas television station reported that lake officials will give $100 to anyone catching a similar fish.
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Paying the top DIGG/REDDIT/Flickr/Newsvine users (or "$1,000 a month for doing what you're already doing.") - The Jason Calacanis Weblog
Monday, July 17, 2006
Jackson Voices God
So, will Samuel L. Jackson be using the infamous "Jules Winnfield" (from Pulp Fiction) voice style when taping God's voice for this project?
Thursday, July 13, 2006
Music Phones Tackle the iPod
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Another example of what "What The?!?!" is all about...
These guys are way before their time. I wonder what they would have thought about this little beauty: "Tin Foil Hats."
Gies 1 1961 Gerrit Gisbers + | Frans 1 1962 Frans Zeelen | Sjef 1 1963 Sjef Kessels |
| Jan 1 1964 Jan Hermsen | Sjang 1 1965 Sjang Gommers + | Herman 1 1966 Herman Grevers |
Is it just me...
I think I just need to quit talking about 80's hair bands with my friend Gary. Damn shows like "Rockstar: Supernova!"
(meant as a joke, if any former/current Ratt members run across this, please know that...)
Couch Potato Utopia, here we come!
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LONDON (Reuters) - A Paralyzed man using a new brain sensor has been able to move a computer cursor, open e-mail and control a robotic device simply by thinking about doing it, a team of scientists said on Wednesday.
They believe the BrainGate sensor, which involves implanting electrodes in the brain, could offer new hope to people Paralyzed by injuries or illnesses.
"This is the first step in an ongoing clinical trial of a device that is encouraging for its potential to help people with paralysis," Dr Leigh Hochberg, of Massachusetts General Hospital, said in an interview.
The 25-year-old man who suffered paralysis of all four limbs three years earlier completed tasks such moving a cursor on a screen and controlling a robotic arm.
He is the first of four patients with spinal cord injuries, muscular dystrophy, stroke or motor neurone disease testing the brain-to-movement system developed by Cyberkinetics Neurotechnology Systems Inc in Massachusetts.
"This is the dawn of major neurotechnology where the ability to take signals out of the brain has taken a big step forward. We have the ability to put signals into the brain but getting signals out is a real challenge. I think this represents a landmark event," said Professor John Donoghue of Brown University in Rhode Island and the chief scientific officer of Cyberkinetics.
The scientists implanted a tiny silicon chip with 100 electrodes into an area of the brain responsible for movement. The activity of the cells was recorded and sent to a computer which translated the commands and enabled the patient to move and control the external device.
"This part of the brain, the motor cortex, which usually sends its signals down the spinal cord and out to the limbs to control movement, can still be used by this participant to control an external device, even after years had gone by since his spinal cord injury," added Hochberg, a co-author of the study published in the journal Nature.
Although it is not the first time brain activity has been used to control a cursor, Stephen Scott of Queen's University in Ontario, Canada said it advances the technology.
"This research suggests that implanted prosthetics are a viable approach for assisting severely impaired individuals to communicate and interact with the environment," he said in a commentary in the journal.
In a separate study, researchers from Stanford University Schools of Medicine and Engineering described a faster way to process signals from the brain to control a computer or prosthetic device.
"Our research is starting to show that, from a performance perspective, this type of prosthetic system is clinically viable," Stephen Ryu, an assistant professor of neurosurgery at Stanford, said in as statement."
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
Woman killed when part of ceiling falls in Big Dig tunnel - Boston.com
By Ken Maguire, Associated Press Writer | July 11, 2006
BOSTON -- A woman was killed when three-ton concrete panels fell from the ceiling of a Big Dig tunnel and crushed the car she was riding in late Monday night, Massachusetts Turnpike Authority officials said. The driver escaped through a car window.A steel tieback that held the 40-foot ceiling section in place over Interstate 90 eastbound gave way, Authority Chairman Matthew Amorello said. Milena Delvalle, 38, of Boston's Jamaica Plain section, was pronounced dead at the scene. The driver, Angel Delvalle, 46, managed to crawl out a window with less than a foot of clearance and suffered minor injuries, according to State Police.
In the immediate aftermath, large slabs sloped down the tunnel wall and across a lane of the roadway.
"There was a snapping sound heard," Amorello said at an early morning news conference Tuesday. "One of the tile panels from the roof released. It caused a series of panels to be released." The car was partially crushed under at least four ceiling panels. The vehicle was in the left lane, giving the driver's side more protection as panels came to rest also on a left-side service walkway that is elevated several feet above the road.
Amorello ordered both sides of the highway section closed for immediate inspections of similar panels. He called in a team from the Federal Highway Administration to assist. Gov. Mitt Romney cut short his vacation in New Hampshire and was returning to Massachusetts on Tuesday morning to meet with his cabinet.
The accident caused huge traffic problems, with backups of several miles on many roadways into the city. Motorists trying to get to and from Logan International Airport were particularly affected because the accident happened near the entrance to the Ted Williams Tunnel, which goes under Boston Harbor to the airport. Both sides of the connector tunnel were expected to remain closed through Tuesday, Amorello said. Traffic headed east to Logan was detoured through the Callahan Tunnel, and westbound traffic exiting the Ted Williams Tunnel was detoured through South Boston. Officials urged commuters and airport travelers to use public transit -- particularly trains or boats -- to get to the airport or into the city. Amorello said he's confident the 200-foot section is the only area of the Big Dig project where the type of tiebacks that failed were used. Those ceiling panels were erected in 1999 and the contractor was Modern Continental, he said.
The $14.6 billion Big Dig highway project, which buried Interstate 93 beneath downtown and extended the Turnpike to the airport, has been criticized for construction problems and cost overruns that state officials have said did not compromise safety. There have been water leaks in parts of the tunnel system and at least one incident when smaller amounts of dirt and debris from an airshaft in another section of the tunnel system fell onto travel lanes, causing minor damage to cars.
In May prosecutors charged six current and former employees of a concrete supplier with fraud for allegedly concealing that some concrete delivered to the Big Dig was not freshly mixed. State and federal officials said that long-term maintenance, not immediate safety, was the likely impact. Amorello said preliminary investigation shows that the quality of the concrete was not to blame for the fatal accident Monday night.Monday, July 10, 2006
Neatorama - "Kids and an Open Can of Paint, What Could Go Wrong?"
Boing Boing: Poorly thought-out label: Hershey's (non) chocolate milk
Mark Frauenfelder:
Three questions come to mind. 1) Why is Hershey's in the business of selling regular milk? 2) And why would it insist on making the label look chocolately? -- it would be like Lipton selling a bottle of water with pictures of tea leaves and a lemon on it. 3) And why Hershey's they make the label opaque so you can't tell at a glance if the milk is flavored or not?
This label is a cognitive disaster. Imagine how upset the people are who buy this expecting chocolate milk and then take a swig of unflavored bovine mammary gland product.
Reader comment: John Binns says All of your other objections to the Hershey packaging were valid. But modern milk containers are opaque to preserve taste and vitamins.
Welcome LDavis!
OED3
Friday, July 07, 2006
Boing Boing: LA gun store says, "Come trade your guitar for a gun!"
Link. No word on whether they'll offer other weapons, too -- come trade your axe for an axe?Today I noticed in their news section that they are expanding and opening a new business called LA Guitar Sales as well.
Some folks like shootin', some folks like rockin', some folks like shootin' and rockin'. The gem of this story, is that for a limited time, to get the new guitar business up and running, they are welcoming trades across hobbies. This means you can trade your Gibson for a Glock. Unfortunately it's unclear if they will have guitars shaped like guns, or guns shaped like guitars.
Freakonomics Blog � How much would Pepsi pay to get Coke’s secret formula?
A few days back some dastardly Coca-Cola employees got nabbed trying to sell corporate secrets to Pepsi. Pepsi turned the bad guys in and cooperated in the sting operation.
Did the executives at Pepsi give up the chance to make huge profits at Coke’s expense in order to “do the right thing?”
I had lunch with my friend and colleague Kevin Murphy yesterday. He made an interesting point: knowing Coke’s secret formula is probably worth almost nothing to Pepsi. Here is the logic.
Let’s say that Pepsi knew Coke’s secret formula and could publish it so that anyone could make a drink that tasted just like Coke. That would be a lot like what happens to prescription drugs when they go off patent and generic drug companies come in. The impact would be that the price of real Coke would fall a lot (probably not all the way to the price of the generic Coke knockoffs). This would clearly be terrible for Coke. It would probably also be bad for Pepsi. With Coke now much cheaper, people would switch from Pepsi to Coke. Pepsi profits would likely fall.
So if Pepsi had Coke’s secret formula, they wouldn’t want to give it away to everyone. What if they instead kept it to themselves and made their own drink that tasted exactly like Coke? If they could really convince people that their drink was identical to Coke, then the new Pepsi-made version of Coke and the Real Thing would be what economists call “perfect substitutes.” When two goods are essentially interchangeable in consumers’ minds, that tends to lead to fierce price competition and very low profits. Neither Coke nor the Pepsi knockoff of it would be very profitable as a consequence. With the price of Coke lower, consumers would switch away from the original Pepsi to either Coke or the new Pepsi-made Coke knockoff, which would be far less profitable than original Pepsi anyway.
In the end, both Coke and Pepsi would likely be worse off if Pepsi had Coke’s secret formula and acted on it.
So, maybe the executives at Pepsi were acting morally and honorably when they turned in the criminals stealing Coke’s secrets.
Or maybe they are just good economists."
Thursday, July 06, 2006
My new favorite puppets!
(click on the pictures to go to the originating sites that tell how to make the puppets, you can't buy these)

the cool hunter - DRIVE THROUGH
"We love ads that think outside the box, unfortunately we don't have any information about the brand, who created it or where its located. Anyone?"
SI.com - Stewart Mandel: "Commissioner for a Day "
My first act as commissioner of college football would be to ...
1. Give college football a commissioner: There is presently no single person or organization in charge of college football, and it shows. The sport is in a state of constant chaos, seeing as even the slightest changes have to meet the approval of, among others, the NCAA, university presidents, conference commissioners, athletic directors, bowl representatives and TV executives. So just having an overarching commissioner would be a huge step.
2. Add a "plus-one" championship game after the BCS bowls: I know, I know, most of you would rather I use my powers to bring about a full-fledged playoff. I'm not ready to go that far yet. I'd hate to see the day when Florida and Florida State rest their starters during their annual rivalry game because they've already locked up playoff berths. However, an extra game would help resolve some of the sport's more absurd injustices (like an undefeated Auburn team getting shut out of a shot at the national title) and make the major bowl games preceding the title game more meaningful.
3. Reduce the number of bowl games: There are currently 32 bowl games slated to be played next season, with literally every 6-6 Big Ten or SEC team assured a spot in the postseason, not to mention third-place teams from the WAC and Conference USA. I'd trim the list to these 15: national title game, Rose, Orange, Sugar, Fiesta, Cotton, Capital One, Gator, Outback, Holiday, Peach, Alamo, Sun, Liberty and Independence. The champions of every Division I-A conference would be guaranteed a berth; everyone else would have to win at least eight games. And all (except the title game) would be played between Christmas and New Year's.
4. Install an early signing day: Recruiting is quickly turning into an uncontrollable headache for both coaches and prospects. A lot of the stress would be alleviated if football was to mimic basketball and install an early signing date -- say, Sept. 1 -- so that prospects can enjoy their senior years of high school without all the drama and distractions of the recruiting rat race. Obviously, a good number would still put off their decisions until February, but at least this way coaches don't have to babysit their early commitments for another six or seven months.
5. Outlaw the hiring of coaches prior to their bowl games: One of the season's most annoying rituals is when, after leading a team through an entire season, preaching the values of teamwork and loyalty, some hot coach bolts for another job right before his team's bowl game (see Dan Hawkins last year, Urban Meyer the year before), creating awkward situations in which he's either coaching a team he has already deserted or leaving some interim coach in his wake. Do like the NFL: No interviewing candidates until after his season's over.
6. Delay polls until Oct. 1: As long as there are preview magazines and websites like this one, there will always be preseason (and pre-preseason) polls. They're fun, and people love them. But they're also pure guesswork, and they create an unofficial "starting point" that creates a severe disadvantage for less-hyped teams that end up doing well. I'd insist that the two polls used by the BCS, the coaches and Harris, refrain from conducting their first edition until after a month of games. Maybe then their rankings would be less slavish to preconceived perceptions and more reflective of the action on the field.
7. Pick a uniform and stick with it: Part of the tradition of college football is that the uniforms are recognizable across generations. A Penn State jersey is unmistakably a Penn State jersey. An Alabama helmet is unmistakably an Alabama helmet. Lately, however, colleges have been mimicking their marketing friends in the pros and instituting all sorts of variations -- retro uniforms, prime-time uniforms, ugly Nike sleeve uniforms. If I was commissioner, each team would pick one uniform style and stick with it every week for at least a 10-year period.
8. No more Tuesday-night games ... or Monday night, or Wednesday night or Friday night: College football was meant to be played on Saturdays. While it's nice that some of the lower-profile teams get more exposure, the more games that get spread over the course of the week, the more it dilutes the sanctity of Saturday. I'd have one Thursday-night game to kick off the weekend -- because for some reason ESPN has a penchant for airing some of its most dramatic games on Thursday nights -- and everything else on Saturday.
9. Shorten the length of games: This one's tricky, because I can't exactly order the television networks to show fewer commercials, and I don't think teams are going to start passing less anytime soon. So the way I'm going to do it is to abolish the college rule of stopping the clock after first downs (except in the final two minutes of each half) and to restart the play-clock as soon as a play is whistled dead rather than waiting for the refs to spot the ball.
10. Prohibit coaches from flip-flopping quarterbacks: I don't know why, but this is may be my single biggest pet peeve in the entire sport. It's one thing for a coach to bring in a "change of pace" quarterback for a few series like Georgia's Mark Richt used to do with D.J. Shockley. But most of the time, when a coach rotates quarterbacks, he can't make up his mind. So from now on, once you name a starting quarterback, you have to keep him as such for at least four straight games, barring documented injury. Better make the right choice in fall camp, guys.
SI.com - Peter King: "Commissioner for a Day"
This is not as laughable as you might think. The NFL is as close to flawless as any sports league in America -- big surprise there -- but the key word there is "close." I can make it better. I can make it perfect. I can out-Tagliabue Paul Tagliabue. And here goes.
1.Expand the regular season to 18 games: Cut the preseason to two games, and expand the regular season by two. Now, I understand how football's a war of attrition, and so you'd have to adjust how teams play the game. So expand the rosters to have every one of the 53 players on the active roster active for each game, instead of only 45. This would give the best players, theoretically, the opportunity to play fewer plays and give each player a better chance to last 18 games. Of course, you'd have to pay the players more because they'd be performing for two more games, but that's for another day. I'm only the commissioner for a day, not a mathematician.
2. Pass a bylaw prohibiting playoff expansion: Twelve teams is enough. It's almost perfect, by the way. Any more, and you risk an 8-8 team in the hockey-like postseason every year. And because some teams that win 10 will occasionally miss the playoffs, the sentiment will be there every year to expand the postseason. So the NFL should act right now and make it next to impossible to ever have a playoff field bigger than 12 teams.
3. Make long field goals more valuable: Simple: Any field goal 50 yards or further is worth four points. No traditionalist would want it. But no traditionalist wanted the three-point shot in basketball, and look how much fun it is to see Dwyane Wade or Vince Carter go wild from 28 feet. Electric stuff. Imagine the Lincoln Financial Field crowd at a 14-10 game, Philadelphia trailing Dallas, late fourth quarter, Eagles' ball, fourth-and-six at the Cowboy 35. "A-kers! A-kers! A-kers!" the crowd shouts, serenading David Akers as he runs on the field. And now the game's in his hands. Or on his foot. It'd add value to the long field goal, and make more games competitive late.
4. Take NFL Sunday Ticket off the dish and put it on digital cable: There are too many people -- like me -- who will never get a dish because digital cable is so good. Makes no sense. How many of those people have no intention of going through the gyrations to get a dish just so they can have every NFL game in their house on 17 Sundays? I don't care what the NFL is making off the dish. The league would make more on digital cable -- and what's more, more people would watch more football. My theory, anyway.
5. Stop the love affair with Los Angeles: Just stop it. I was in L.A. in April and conducted my own unscientific poll at an Irish pub (the L.A. Red Sox bar) in Santa Monica: Do you want an NFL team here? Now, most of the people in there were twentysomethings on their fourth Harp or Red Hook, but I didn't hear one enthusiastic response. And that's half of the demographic the NFL wants. The other half -- the big-moneyed -- will support a franchise. But I don't think the populace will. And the NFL hasn't been hurt by it since the Raiders and Rams left.
6. Put more mikes on players and officials, and put the game on a seven-second delay: There's still an antiseptic feel to games, and you know what fans want. They want to be closer to the action. The way to do that, simply, is to make the field closer to the living room. By putting the seven-second delay on, you'd have a red button in every control truck to knock out the curse words. The game would be more alive, more organic.
7. Let players wear the numbers of their choice -- with an asterisk: Allow players to purchase the number they wish for $250,000. One-time fee. That $250,000, which players could write off, would go into a pool to benefit 10 charities to be agreed upon by the players' association and the league. And once a year, the league would cut an equal check to each charity. So imagine a player changes teams, or a draft choice comes on a new team, and he wants to wear an odd number. Reggie Bush with number 5, for instance. Imagine you've got 20 of those guys per year. And new commissioner Roger Goodell appears in the Lower Ninth Ward of New Orleans to hand a check for $500,000 to Habitat for Humanity, which guarantees to build 100 homes in 30 days with the money. Gee, the more I write about this, the more I like it.
8. Prohibit the moving of the Saints for five years: Make this a "for the good of the game" issue. It's ludicrous to think of kicking a city when it's so down. Now's the time to be a good neighbor and a loyal corporate partner, not greedy.
9. Put two computer chips in the football, and make the goal line, in essence, capable of sending a signal when the football touches the plane of the goal line: Let's just call this "The Ben Roethlisberger Rule."
10. Make the Super Bowl the best two out of three: Ha! Made you look. Just kidding. I may be commissioner, but I'm not that stupid.
'I'm a celebrity, get me an honorary degree!'
Why bother going to college, studying hard and getting into debt for the sake of some letters after your name? All you need to do is get famous - and they'll throw doctorates at you. But why? Stuart Jeffries reports
Thursday July 6, 2006
The Guardian
On July 11 2001, Billy Connolly was awarded an honorary Doctor of Letters by the University of Glasgow. He was thrilled, telling reporters: "It's an enormous honour to get, especially from academia, because my behaviour over the years hasn't exactly been academic. I have had salmon flies named after me and I thought that was my lot."
The Daily Mail eulogised the Scottish funnyman's honour: "The boy from Anderston may have left school aged 15 with no qualifications but his success on stage and screen has more than earned him his place among the nation's brightest talents."
I love that phrase "more than earned". It suggests: you may think you're clever Stephen Hawking, and all you other big-brained Britons, but you're nothing next to the Big Yin. You might think the phrase "less than earned" would have been more appropriate, but that would show you to be out of step with what celebrity can achieve in what many contend is this increasingly dumb Britain.
Celebrating the award with him in 2001 was his wife Pamela Stephenson, who five years earlier had completed six years' study for a PhD in clinical psychology at the California Graduate Institute. In the light of Connolly's honorary degree, one really wonders why she bothered. Indeed, at a time when a degree costs at least three years of your life minimum and up to £20,000 in tuition fees and living costs, why does any student bother? Surely it would be much less demanding to become famous for something fatuous (how's your father in the BB Jacuzzi, centre-court streaking) and then issue your demand: "I'm a celebrity, get me an honorary doctorate!"
This, you might be forgiven for thinking, is the way academia is going. In 2002, for example, the University of Wolverhampton gave honorary degrees to members of Slade. Italian referee Pierluigi Collina has one from Hull. Over-indulged bigmouth TV presenter Jeremy Clarkson has one from Oxford Brookes University. Michael Douglas and Joanna Lumley just got ones from St Andrews (his is for - no really - "services to film"). The Bee Gees' Robin and Barry Gibb are honorary doctors of music at the University of Manchester, sharing their degree with their late brother Maurice. The titles are revealing: a Doctor of Letters is usually accorded to arty types or entertainers; when Kofi Annan received his honorary doctorate from Oxford they made him a doctor of civil law - there is method in the honorary madness. There is, however, only one Honorary Doctorate in Amphibious Studies: it was awarded to Kermit the Frog in 1996 by Long Island's Southampton College (whatever that is).
(article continued here)
Tin Foil Hats
"It's common knowledge that aliens or the government or something is beaming harmful signals throughout the universe nonstop, 24/7. This is what makes almost everyone mindless hypnoslaves, forced to conform to society's norms. But not you, for you are wisely covering your head with dynamic space-age metal, the only substance known to repel those hypnowaves: tin foil. With your homemade tin foil hat, your brain is safe."
Boy, what would the fellas have said about Howard Cunningham if he had gone to a Leopard Lodge meeting in one of these?
Soda-Pop Espionage!
CNN.com - Three charged with stealing Coca-Cola secrets - Jul 5, 2006: "ATLANTA, Georgia (AP) -- Three people have been arrested and charged with stealing confidential information about drink recipes from The Coca-Cola Co. and trying to sell it to rival PepsiCo Inc., federal prosecutors said Wednesday."
A sting uncovered an alleged scheme to sell secret Coca-Cola recipes to rival Pepsi for $1.5 million.
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Boing Boing: Bizarre 80s infomercial for fake gold jewelry called Santo Gold
Boing Boing, Mark Frauenfelder: WFMU's Beware of the Blog presents the strange saga of Santo Gold. It was some kind of fake gold jewelry, and the guy who invented it also produced a movie (Blood Circus) that plugged Santo Gold. The infomercial for Santo Gold is delightfully baffling.
Yahoo news: Air pollution, cramped living in Athens breeding 'super mosquitoes'
Cramped housing conditions and air pollution in Athens have given rise to a 'super breed' of mosquito that is larger, faster and more adept at locating human prey, a Greek daily has reported.
The 'super mosquitoes' of the Greek capital also beat their wings up to 500 times a second -- compared to 350 beats for other variations -- and are larger by 0.3 microgrammes on average, the paper said, citing a study conducted by Aristotelio University in the northern city of Salonika.
According to the study, the mosquitoes of Athens have adapted to deal with air pollution and insect repellents, and overpopulation in the Greek capital of over four million has provided them with a healthy food supply.
'Mosquitoes can lay their eggs even inside the trays placed beneath thousands of balcony flowerpots,' Athens University professor of zoology Anastassios Legakis told the daily."
Monday, July 03, 2006
Just in case some of my "old" friends are tired of carrying around med bottles...oed3
This fridge has nothing on our "box camouflaged" cubicle fridge...oed3
Great. Thanks to my friend Gary for sending me a bunch of optical illusions...oed3
It is called the McCollough Effect, and was originally described by Celeste McCollough in a paper in Science in 1965. It has been the focus of on-going investigation ever since.The effect typically lasts for hours, or even overnight. The duration can be changed by the consumption of coffee and other psychoactive drugs. One paper found that it is stronger in extroverts than introverts, and might be a reliable test for extroversion.
The precise cause of the effect is unknown, and currently under investigation. It is not a simple case of fatigued neurons: there are neurotransmitters involved and appear to be responsible for the long-lasting nature of the effect. It probably takes place in the V1 processing stage of visual information. This is the first image processing after the signal leaves the retina in the eye. The edge detection circuits somehow become associated with the color. At this stage the processing is monocular: the images from the two eyes have not been combined.